You are here: Home / 2011 / Archives for March 2011

A Little Spring in Your Closet!

March 31, 2011 By

spring wear

Spring is in the air! Flowers are blooming, birds are chirping, the sun is shining and you are panicking! What the heck am I going to wear?  It’s time to clean out the closets and dust off your sandals and get ready for the warmer days ahead! For most women, it’s a daunting task to start thinking about showing a little skin, but I promise, this season will be a little different!

If you’re anything like me, your daily go-to outfit consists of a black top and jeans. If you work in an office, you probably have your favorite black slacks that you wear with your favorite buttoned-down shirt. And if you don’t have a choice, ie: you wear a uniform, there really is no option for style. What’s a gal to do?

Here are a few simple tips to help ease your mind and ease you into a sassy spring!

1.     Opt for color! Don’t be afraid of the bright colors you’re seeing in the stores! Start small by switching out that black tee for a coral one. Wear a floral tank top under your black cardigan or vice versa! Carry a bright bag or throw on a pair of cheeky sunglasses. A little color goes a long way.

2.     Update your jewelry wardrobe! You don’t have to buy a brand new wardrobe each season. With a few extra dollars, you can surely achieve spring status by sporting a gorgeous turquoise necklace.  A bold pair of earrings instead of plain hoops with your pony tail or cropped haircut would look amazing and a bold statement necklace with fun colors can make any little black dress wish it wasn’t black!

3.     Neutralize! If you’re a little afraid of color, you’re in luck! Nude colors are everywhere and they go with everything! A simple pair of silver flats or nude heels can dramatically change an outfit! Olive greens and grays are making a serious stamp in the handbag department. Neutral colors are simply neutral. You really can’t go wrong!

So go ahead. Embrace the season. Take a much needed, child-free trip to your favorite store and start your spring style. Maybe you’re ahead of the game and have already dabbled in a few shopping days.

How have you updated your look? What is your favorite style tip for Spring?

Hoping to keep you sassy and stylish,

Kacie

Filed Under: Fashion & Beauty Tagged With: , , , ,

Get Your Children To Do As You Ask

March 31, 2011 By

kids and chores

If you’re like most parents, you would like your children to do as you ask—to help with the housework, to do their homework, to stay the heck out of the street—but you’ve discovered that it’s not always easy. You may bribe, cajole, beg and threaten but then end up doing the work yourself. Our tendency as parents is to be action-oriented and when we don’t see immediate results we may respond with frustration or anger.

Children are born ready to learn, grow and thrive and most children actually love contributing and working. But children are also designed for independence, mastery and attachment. If you want to get your children to do anything your best approach is to appeal to their instincts for growth and development.

Here are some stress free strategies for peace-infused task completion.

1. Stop calling them chores or work: No one wants to do a chore; no one wants to do homework either. Instead, identify each concrete task for what it is.

2. Engage your children in the process: Work doesn’t have to be a bore. Turn on some fun music while you all dust or race to pick up toys.

3. Assign age-appropriate tasks: Children learn responsibility by taking care of themselves. Children should be able to get up, make beds, brush teeth, comb hair, take a bath, do their homework, read at night, and put away their toys etc at an early age. As they mature, with demonstration of responsibility comes the privilege of taking on more difficult tasks.

4. Make tasks brain food: What would be the fastest way to empty the dishwasher? Silverware or plates first?

5. Think simple: Don’t overwhelm children with several requests at once. One task, one special together time.

6. Focus on the relationships: Don’t forget thank-yous, hugs and praises. Everyone appreciates a pat on the back. They’ll be more willing to help out next time!

You set the stage for your children to do as you ask. Help them do the right thing.

Filed Under: Home & Family Tagged With: , , ,

Giving Multi-Tasking a Bad Name

March 31, 2011 By

multi-tasking mom

Just when I thought multi-tasking could be elevated to even higher levels of esteem, I am faced with some realities and distinctions of this efficient (or is it?) habit.

Turns out there are two different kinds of multi-tasking going on out there and they are not created equal.

So let’s create a few distinctions:

Level 1 multi-tasking: This is where you are doing two complete tasks concurrently, i.e. returning a phone call while emptying the dishwasher or making your daughter’s appt. for her annual checkup, while waiting for your car to get washed.  A couple of things get done at the same time and no one’s the wiser.  I’m all for it!
Level 2 multi-tasking: This is where you keep checking your email while you are supposed to be writing your company’s annual report or answering your phone when your daughter is in the middle of telling you about her day at school.  Level 2 results in nothing getting done well.   This is not efficient and therefore, not worth it.  Throw the bums out!

multi- tasking sign
And let’s throw two more concepts in – batching and first things first.

Batching is where you combine activities that are alike and do them all at the same time.  For example;  grocery shopping for the entire week, returning phone calls all at once and checking your email just once or twice during the day.

First Things First is exactly what you think it is.  Before you tackle the smaller incidental tasks that might be easier, make the hard phone call and get started on that day’s difficult project.
I’ve always been a fan of multi-tasking, and used that term as an umbrella for many different ways of getting things done.  But, now I think Level 1 multi-tasking with a bit of First Things First and a sprinkle of batching, is the recipe for me.

What’s your recipe?
•    Think of a time that you felt most efficient.  What are the tools you used?
•    How can you use those tools each day?  What would have to be different in your life to allow for that?
•    Can you make that happen?  If so, how?  When?

Cooking up some level 1 right now,

Jamee

Filed Under: Mom-Empowerment Tagged With: , , ,

You Can Manage Stress…one massage at a time.

March 31, 2011 By

OMGosh I am so excited that Jennifer asked me to participate with NAFBM.  I have never written a blog before but I am passionate about massage and learning to manage stress.  I am always energized to share what I have learned on this amazing life journey. I am really eager to hear your experiences and questions. Let’s get the party started.

I am Tammy Carlos. I am married to Frankalicious (term of endearment). We have an eclectic blended family of seven kids and four grandkids. We live in Aliso Viejo, CA and the rest of the FAM is all over the country and some serving in the armed forces. I married Frank about a year and a half ago; I was a single mom for twelve years and spent the better part of twenty years as a Property Manager in the apartment industry and later with homeowners associations.

All I’m saying……………it was stressful.

About four years ago I started feeling really ill, many symptoms of stress and it got so bad that the Doctor thought I might have Cushing (a benign tumor on your pituitary gland). Remember the little girl on Kindergarten Cop, “It’s not a tumor”. I was diagnosed with di-stress  due to excessive Cortisol. The good Doc did offer a plethora of anti-anxiety, MAO and sleeping RX.  An excellent long term solution.  His advice… manage your stress, really? It still makes me laugh, because how do you do that?

When I couldn’t take one more day of dreading my day, I surrendered. I was sitting in my office and thought “what is the most relaxing thing I do”? GET A MASSAGE! So, I went online and found Healing Hands School of Massage Therapy. I called and registered for the first class I could and wrote my letter of resignation. So, off of the suite and on with the yoga pants. I found passion and the gift of healing. I shared my days with others seeking peace. I found my center and today I perceive myself as a facilitator of healing.

Ok let’s break it down. What is stress and how do you manage it?

The human body is designed to experience and react to stress, it is normal. It keeps us alert and ready to avoid danger like a dinosaur hanging out at the entrance to your cave. Stress becomes a negative when there is no break between physical or emotional challenges.

Acute stress produces a huge rush of adrenaline and gets you ready to fight and run (day after Thanksgiving sale and Nordstrom Rack). This is good. Chronic prolonged stress increases catecholamines and cortisol steroid hormones that raise the heart rate and blood pressure, causes sleep deprivation and suppress the immune system making us vulnerable to illness and disease. This is bad.

Stress is pandemic and these statistics are crazy!

43% of all adults suffer from the adverse health effects of stress.

90% of all doctors office visits are for stress related ailments and complaints.

Work related stress cost $300 billion annually to lost sick days and disability.

While it is impossible to get rid of stress, it is possible to control the deadly effects of stress on the body to some extent. How stress affects the immune system is definitely dependent on your ability to handle stress or MOST importantly your ability to relax. I know that very few folks have the option of walking away from a stress filled career or relationship, but taking action every day to manage stress is not an option if you want to maintain your health.

One solution may be relatively simple, even ancient. TOUCH!

woman-massage

The Chinese have been using touch or pressure massage for centuries. Massage connects the energy of the client with the therapist, allowing a flow of life-force energy in the body to balance and harmonize as well as to support all types of healing. Empowering yourself to take control of your health and well-being. Massage activates the parasympathetic nervous system allowing your body to move into an alpha state where you rejuvenate and restores balance. Massage allows you to apply the brakes to the stress train. Massage also assist the Lymphatic system to carry away toxins, improves circulation, relieves pain, fatigue and stress.

Inquire with your massage therapist or doctor if massage is ok if you have an existing medical conditional. There are a few contra indications for massage.

  • A high fever
  • Infection
  • Over indulging with alcohol
  • Receiving chemo therapy
  • In the first three months of pregnancy.

Over the next few weeks I will talk about different styles of massage and why it feels so good. Thanks for reading. Have a great week and remember “I got your back!”

Tammy

Filed Under: Health & Wellness Tagged With: , , , ,

Can you sleep your way to a healthy weight?

March 31, 2011 By

woman sleeping

When it comes to healthy weight, we all know that our food choices and exercise play a big role, but did you know that adequate sleep is also important?

Studies have shown that people who get too little sleep tend to weigh more than those who get adequate amounts of sleep.

Why?

The answer is not completely clear, but hear are some of the possible reasons:

  • With little sleep comes little energy, which can lead to skipping your workout for the day.
  • Low energy also contributes to poor food choices – usually high calorie, high sugar foods and beverages are consumed in an effort to feel more energetic.
  • Some research shows that too little sleep may actually affect the hormones that regulate hunger, leaving you hungrier following a sleepless night.  So even if you are making good food choices, you may still over consume calories.

Sleep, healthy food choices, and regular exercise will all lead to more energy, a positive mindset, and the feeling that you can take on the challenges that busy mom’s face.

Why not start with a good night’s sleep tonight?  Clock your 8 hours and wake up refreshed, re-energized, and ready for the day!  And don’t forget to top it off with a healthy breakfast.

Next week I’ll cover some high quality, great tasting options for your morning meal.

Filed Under: Fashion & Beauty Tagged With: , , , ,

6 Questions to Ask Before You Start Your Next Diet

March 31, 2011 By

vegetables

Have you ever been one of those women that says “I’m going to start my diet on Monday so I’ll just enjoy myself now”? It’s come out of my mouth before. I’ve also started, stopped a diet and restarted the same one all in the same day before. It’s not uncommon, we decide we want to start a diet without really being ready. Diets don’t work, lifestyle changes do.

So, what do you need to do to get ready to lose weight?


See the tips below to determine if you’re really ready to invest in an eating or lifestyle change before you start your next diet:

1. Decisions, Decisions. Ask yourself if you’re ready to make lifestyle changes. Are you ready to do what you need to do to get where you want to go? A quick assessment will help you decide.

2. Are you ready to take it slow? Making lifestyle changes take some time. Habits take time to break. Knowing what will work for you takes time to figure out. Expecting fast results will only lead to disappointment and frustration when you don’t see the results you’re expecting.

3. Is this for REAL? Is the eating plan you’ve decide to follow realistic? Is it something you can follow in your day? Does it require a lifestyle change. How easy or difficult will the changes be? These are some things you need to consider before you jump in.

4. Ease into it. Fasting and detoxing can be tough on your body.  Be careful in choosing what you will do. Make sure the approach you are taking is appropriate for you.

5. Take Care of You. Have you been taking care of yourself? What’s your baseline? Have you had your check ups? Do you need to make significant changes or small ones? Along with looking at eating and lifestyle changes you can also look at what you need to do for further wellness.

6. Get Support. If you have been a chronic dieter or struggled with losing weight then you may need additional support. Working with a professional may be just what you need to get the ball rolling and make this the last time you need to lose weight and get back in balance.

Are you ready to start your next one or are you on one right now? What has worked for you before? Can you think of things that have gotten in the way?

Filed Under: Health & Wellness Tagged With: , , , ,

Time Out or Time In?

March 30, 2011 By

child stressed out

April is Stress Awareness Month and your kids need your help.  Oh yes, kids experience stress and what makes their situation worse than an adult is that they don’t always know how to recognize the stress or manage it.  It’s not their fault because their brains haven’t necessarily developed to do this.

A two year old temper tantrum is a form of stress because she can’t necessarily articulate that she’s tired and hungry.  A teenager may get silent and gloomy because he doesn’t know how to manage the stress of peer pressure.  Your son may slam a door because he’s frustrated and stressed at constantly striking out at baseball, or your daughter may get grouchy because of the stress of verbal bullying about the clothes she wears.  Whatever the cause, stress will show up in children’s behaviors if they don’t know how to manage it.

So what’s a parent to do?


Three steps come to mind:

First, be a keen observer of your child’s moods and behavior patterns.  Don’t count on teachers or coaches to always tell you when “something’s up” with your kid.  Try to pick up on the cues yourself by observing for shifts in their behavior.  The older some kids get, the better they mask their feelings thus minimizing the opportunity for parents to help them in expressing or managing them.

Second, be a patient guiding force. Help your child to articulate what is going on in their head.  Ask questions and impart your loving guidance to help them find a solution.  Whenever possible invoke your child’s opinion in the problem solving.  This helps them to start training the brain for solutions.

Third, be a loving disciplinarian. If your child’s stressful outbursts are inappropriate, by all means render consequences as you need to, but consider this… Many parents give their children a punishment or a “time out” in which they can think about their behaviors.  Often times, kids just stew during this period of time and end up harboring resentment toward the situation as well as the parent who punished them.  What if these kids had a “time IN” instead? A brilliant lady named Linda Lantieri suggests just this in her book Building Emotional Intelligence.

child meditatingMs. Lantieri suggests that a small area of your home can be turned in to a special oasis of calm that can actually helps kids to manage their stress.  They don’t have to be sent there as a punishment for negative behavior, but can go there to calm down before or after negative behavior sets in.  What a brilliant idea!  What’s even better is that you can ask your child to help you set the area up in a way that they find it inviting.  Avoid electronics like TV or handheld game but do consider calming music, stuffed animals (for younger kids), books, puzzles, or even a candle (safety first!).  It can be made comfortable with soft seating and inviting pillows.  Parents may find they want their own “Time In”.

Give it a try and share your thoughts in our comments section!

Filed Under: Home & Family Tagged With: , , , , , , ,

1 Morning Routine, 2 Perspectives

March 30, 2011 By

“The key to everything is patience. You get the chicken by hatching the egg, not by smashing it.” ~ Arnold H. Glasgow~

First Scenario:

A woman sets her alarm 10 minutes early. Wanting some quiet time to write down her daily goal and affirmation. Just then, her daughter walks into the room. The woman thinks to herself, rolling her eyes,  “I never get time for myself.” Frustrated, she stumbles out of bed, and yells to her daughter, “Go get ready for school.”

Once in the kitchen, still frustrated, she unintentionally dismisses conversation with her daughter. The daughter feels the tension, and watches her mother huffing & puffing.

The husband comes in, and tells her, he will be late for dinner. She immediately snaps, and begins an argument, while the daughter is listening.

He ends up leaving; tense, mad, and full of resentment. Nearly hitting the neighbors car, and gestures rudely, while he screeches his tires, and speeds through the neighborhood.

Second Scenario:

A woman sets her alarm 10 minutes early. Wanting some quiet time, to write down her daily goal and affirmation. Just then, her daughter walks into the room. The woman thinks to herself, rolling her eyes,  “I never get time for myself.” She decides to invite her daughter to come lay down with her. They discuss their plans  for the day, and decide together what they want to accomplish. Then, the mother asks her daughter “What do you like most about yourself ?” The conversation lasts for about 5 minutes and they get up to go get ready for the day.

After everyone is gone, the women takes a few minutes, to write her goal and affirmation down, in her Stress Release Reminder’s Custom Journal.

She writes:

Daily Goal~

  • “Teach my daughter patience.“

daily Affirmation~

  • “I am a very good mother.”

Highlights from today~

  • 1st, My daughter told me, “I want to be a mother  just like you, mom!”
  • 2nd, “Not cooking, my husband is bringing home my favorite carry out!” ;-)

Sometimes it is very difficult to step back for a moment, and think about what is most important in your life. In this story, the woman realizes that being a good mother, is what is most important. This is one reason why I started Stress Release Reminders. After using the technique, situations like this one, start to become habit. Being reminded many times a day, to take a deep breath, helps to think more clearly. Loosening the built up muscle tension, helps to keep better health. Then, to focus on  “What I want most in life.”

Filed Under: Mom-Empowerment Tagged With: , , ,

Child-Like Point of View…Where Did It Go?

March 24, 2011 By

Children have neither past nor future; they enjoy the present, which very few of us do.  ~Jean de la Bruyere~

Childlike-Like or befitting a child, as in innocence, trustfulness, or candor.

Remember the days when life was simple. The biggest decisions of the day were; shall I skip to my friend’s house, or walk? Or shall I dig for worms or catch fireflies? Now, as adults, we tend to worry about the future or regret our past decisions. We tend to have a hard time focusing on the moment.

One of the biggest rewards of spending time with children, is it allows you to see the world through their eyes. To go back to a time of innocence, and viewing the world as a new discovery. We can still have this, it just takes practice. It takes patience to step back, slow down, and look around. Stress Release Reminder’s stress management program reminds you to do this and maybe a helpful tool in this practice.

When you allow yourself to slow down you will discover new things.  Life does not have to be so busy, you create your mind-set.

Your schedule can still include the activities you want out of life, but looking at the environment, enjoying the surroundings, and observing nature helps you to slow down.

Childlike qualities are endless, but the ones that I wish to emulate are:

  • being present in the moment
  • letting go of worries I have no control of
  • not focusing on other people opinions of me
  • exploring my imagination and creativity
  • be more playful and allow myself to be silly and laugh
  • and live without judgment

So, like a forgotten fire, a childhood can always flare up again within us.  ~Gaston Bachelard~

Skipping, blowing bubbles, swinging on a park swing, making a snow angel, watching the clouds go by, picking clovers to make a necklace, playing a sport, watching a bird make its nest, digging for worms, catching fireflies, are all great past times. Try stepping out of your adult shoes, go barefoot and relive these cherished memories.

Filed Under: Mom-Empowerment Tagged With: , , , , ,

All Moms to Lift, Play and Yodel

March 24, 2011 By

happy mom with child

To be an effective mom, we need to learn how to deal with our feelings of overwhelm and stress. Life-demands can come at us from all directions at one time – work, kids, marriage, home… They all can add up to an enormous weight on our shoulders where it seems like the tight rope is going to snap any minute now.

So… What’s the answer?

As they say in the movies, ah…. fo-git ’bout it! Lift up those pressures, because everything is going to be alright. We are no good to ourselves and the important people around us as crabby, short-fused mommies and wives.

It’s time to play! Take a breather and rediscover the gift your kids know how to use. Play games, play silly, play happy for a while. It’ll put a smile on your face, your kids’ faces and you get to spend some quality time with the family they will always remember. Being a mom is an inspiring, yet humbling experience. We must not take ourselves too seriously.

So, take a load off… roll up your sleeves… take off your shoes… wiggle your arms and jump on one foot in a circle while yodeling!

baby sticking out tongue

Do it now!  It’s doctor’s orders!

Filed Under: Mom-Empowerment Tagged With: , , , , , , , ,
« Older Posts