What To Do While the Kids are at Summer Camp

Guest Post by Adam, a blogger who helps numerous people with their day and life balance. He also helps small companies and businesses grow whether they sell kids pajamas or are trying to get attendance for broadway shows.


mom and summer
Summer camp can be a blessing and a curse at the same time. You get a month or two away from your kids where you can relax. The issue you may find with the extra time you have is that you forgot to plan ahead to fill in the alone time. This time can be used for many things.

Here are 3 things that you can do to fill in that time, better yourself and help to become more productive while the kids are away:

1. Full time jobs and prepping ahead.

If you currently have a full time job but it is not as satisfying as you would like, you can take this time to research other positions, see if there is anything opened at your company and train yourself to interview for the position. Not only will you have the time to properly redo your resume, but you can spend the time practicing your interview and pitch as to why you are the right fit for the new role. You can also spend this time catching up or getting ahead with your job if you are happy.

If you are happy, take the extra time to finally file all of your receipts and paperwork. You can also use it to prepare ahead of time for projects that will be coming up. If you have things from the past that you know you will reference again, try to start filing or entering them into a new database where you can more easily find them. The list of things you can do when you have this time to better yourself at your current job is almost endless and you should create a chart with what you will accomplish each day or week to help get ready for when your kids come back and your extra time goes away.

2. Learn something new.

Taking classes, getting certifications and increasing your skill and knowledge set is one of the most important things a person can do. With your kids away, you will not only have time to take the classes, but you’ll have quiet time at home to actually study for them. Use this time to take a course and learn something that can help to progress your career and move you forward or into a higher paying role. You can even take a class that will help you be more efficient at your current job which may help to make your own life easier.

3. Find a way to de-stress and turn it into a routine.

One of the best things to do if you feel stressed out from work and your kids is to learn how to de-stress while they are away. It could be taking a Yoga class a few days a week since you’ll have the time and then learning the moves so you can practice at home or in your office with a shorter but still effective routine to help you keep stress away. Having the time to learn to distress and finding a way to bring it into your daily routine is the perfect thing to do while your kids are at camp.

Having the kids at Summer Camp can be great for you. It gives you time to better yourself for your career, learn to distress and also gain more knowledge or skills. By thinking ahead, putting down your goals and mapping out the time you will work on them each day will help you to make the most out of your free time to help better yourself for the next year.

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Guest Post by Adam, a blogger who helps numerous people with their day and life balance. He also helps small companies and businesses grow whether they sell kids pajamas or are trying to get attendance for broadway shows.

The Secret to Successful Solitude

I confess: I’m an introvert. I know it’s hard to believe since I babble and blab my life story all over the Internet. But when it comes to how I spend my day and the surroundings that fill me with energy, I need a good bit of solitude. Guess that’s what makes me suitable for the home office environment! And it’s what led me to create a practice of journal writing, yoga, running (solo!), reading and prayer.

Yes, I love to spend time alone. I thrive on it! Maybe it’s because I have three young children and I’m constantly reacting and responding to the needs of others. Or maybe it’s because I’m not very good at shutting out distractions and I need quiet to hear the conversations taking place in my head. Whatever the reason, the benefits of some “me time” in my day are extraordinary!

When I start my day with an hour of solitude (by journaling, running or some other solo-practice):

  • I’m happier and more fun to be around!
  • My body has more energy to help me lead a productive day!
  • I’m more patient with my kids.
  • My mind is overflowing with creativity.
  • I feel connected to God and comforted by his presence.

Could you use a little alone time in your day? If so, I’ll let you in on some of my secrets to successful solitude. What I’ve discovered is that there are three key ingredients (Three P’s) to practicing daily solitude:

  1. Permission: Give yourself permission to be fully present and embrace the quiet. That means letting go of the thoughts that wander through your mind about where you “should” be right now, and what you “should” be accomplishing and who you “should” be spending time with. Just accept the gift of silence and solitude and let it seep in through your pores and fill your spirit.
  2. Priority: If you’re a busy mom, then solitude does not naturally occur. You have to schedule it into your day. Physically enter it into your calendar. Sure, there may be windows of opportunity when the kids are not home and you can sit down with a cup of tea, but are you actually going to do that? I won’t. Unless it’s on the calendar!
  3. Proclaim: Sometimes it’s necessary to set expectations so that your loved ones know what you are doing and why it’s so important. A friend of mine once told me she woke up every morning at 5 am just so she could have an hour alone before her kids stumbled out of bed. One day her daughter set her alarm so she could join mom for some “girl time.” Very sweet. But it took away mom’s only hour of quiet during the day! So be clear when you set your schedule and let your family (and possibly friends and colleagues) know that you need this time alone because it fills your spirit and makes you a better person!

Want to really experience the benefits of solitude? Take the Solitude Challenge and travel solo. Go on a quiet retreat in the mountains, rent a beach cottage in the off-season or visit a charming little town you’ve always wanted to explore. Take a journal with you and write or doodle your way through the adventure.

Be sure to let me know what you discover!

Meditate with Your Children: It’s as easy as 1-2-3

family-meditation

One path toward shifting your thoughts, particularly your judgmental or negative thoughts is through sustained non-judgmental attention or meditation. Meditation is the experience of sustaining one’s focus on a thought, word, sensation or sound in order to calm the mind.

Mindful meditation is the act of calming your mind and body through non-judgmental sustained attention.

If you are prone to rumination, negative thinking or catastrophizing, mindful meditation is a skill you may wish to explore. If you find that you are overwhelmed with work, life, people, finances or parenting cultivating a sense of peace, developing more neutral thoughts, and appreciating what you have in the moment will likely help decrease your experience of stress. Health benefits abound.

Let’s say you are ready to feel better, to think more positively and to feel less distressed. Begin by simply adding ten minutes of mindful meditation to your day. You can do it in the morning right when you wake up, in the evening before you go to sleep or anytime you feel fidgety, anxious, overwhelmed, sad, angry or depressed. Meditation can take place anywhere, in the mall, in the swimming pool, or in your car. You need not “go somewhere” to meditate. Meditate where ever you are.

Start with your “Beginner’s Mind” allowing yourself to relax into the experience as though you have never been in this moment before.

  1. Sit in an upright position with your ribs aligned over your hips and your shoulders aligned over your ribs. (I prefer to lie down, you can as well, if you wish)
  2. Close your eyes to reduce distraction and breathe.
  3. Breathe. 1-2-3 in, 1-2-3 out, in through your nose out through your nose or mouth.
  4. Bring your focus into your breath, feel your breath moving in and out, see your breath, color your breath, feel your breath oxygenate your blood and feed the cells of your body.
  5. When your mind wanders, in a relaxed manner bring your focus back to your breath.
  6. Feel your body relax, experience your minds reflections.

For children who are restless, consider having them lay with a warm blanket or a heating pad. Often the warmth and containment in space help them relax. Music from Stressfreekids.com is also a great help. In fact, I use their stories and sounds in my office regularly.

After about fifteen minutes you may slowly open your eyes and note how you feel refreshed and ready for what life has in store for you. Over time you may choose to extend your mindful moments. You may choose to meditate up to 45 minutes a day. You may choose to meditate or pay mindful attention when you grocery shop, pump gas, or talk with your neighbor. Feel the intimacy in your relationships grow as you give your conversational experiences with friends, your undivided mindful attention.

You may bring mindfulness into your parenting by increasing your undistracted, sustained attention with your children. Through mindfulness, you will naturally experience being more “present” with your children. You may lose your keys less often and even yell less, as your mindful experiences allow you to live more peacefully and non-judgmentally in the moment.

Peaceful moments to you.

For books and resources you may choose to visit The UCLA Semel Institute and The UCSD Center for Mindfulness.

Honey, You Need Help!

overworked mom

I looked in the mirror this morning and this is what I saw… a very tired woman. Not unhappy, not yelling at the kids, but just plain tired.

It’s not that I cannot do everything that needs to be done.  I can, as long as I don’t sleep.  But not sleeping leads to a very cranky version of myself that does not go over well with the rest of the family, so that’s not an option.   I tell myself; “Fine, just eliminate items from your ‘to-do’ list.”

But what can go?  My daughter needs a costume for the talent show and I promised my other daughter that I would arrange a play date for her.  I’ve got 3 new clients who I am excited about working with and I’m not going to give up the work I love.  I want to sit down and have dinner with my children tonight.  All of it is important… so what is a woman to do?

HONEY, GET HELP! Do you feel you have to do it all yourself?  Sometimes I will think that if I give in and hire someone to help me, I’ve lost the battle.  I want to believe I can bring home the bacon AND fry it up in a pan!  Why?  Cuz’ I’m a W O M A N? No, because I’m C R A Z Y!

So, what are the items on your list that you don’t have to do yourself?  Can someone clean your house?  Can someone pick up your kids from school?  Can your older child help a younger child with homework?  Can your husband pick up the dry cleaning on the way home?  What are some small ways that you can get help, because honey, you need it!   And you know what, your family needs you to get help also because if you are overwhelmed, you can’t really be with them in the way you want to be.

What could be more important than that?

COACH ME QUICK TIPS FOR GETTING HELP:

  • Identify one or two things you do, that you don’t care about doing.  Cleaning toilets, anyone?
  • Brainstorm some solutions with your family and ask them to help.
  • Look at your budget.  Can you afford to spend some money each week to make life easier?  What is 5 additional hours worth to you?
  • Notice if you are resisting getting help?  Does having help make you less of a woman, mother or spouse?  If so, it might be time to rethink thinking and get the help you need.